The RE Dr. Brahma called me herself to tell me. Everything looks great, BETA(HCG), Estrogen, and Progesterone. Now the wait is on until Tuesday September 4, 2012 for a second check.
I believe the IM is happy!!
Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you! Please continue to have your hand on this pregnancy.
Amen
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Thursday, August 23, 2012
More Contract ... REALLY?
I am struggling right now.
Yesterday I was greeted with a text from the lawyer that helped our family with the contract. She was referencing an email that I had not yet read. "I'm going to let you handle that email, 'cause I won't be nice in my response. ..." (text) "A and I really apologize for overlooking any part of the contract. I have to be honest and say that I have not read over the contract as I should, but will make a concerted effort to do so this weekend. A ... we were responsible for Miscellaneous expenses* for July and Aug on top of the $*** at time of meds and the $*** at time of transfer. We would never try to back out of our obligations ... let us know if you have a concern. We will get ... squared away. The only other concern ... the cost of your attorney. If we owe the money we will pay it, ..., Attorney C and her staff completed the bulk of the contract including legal wording for Georgia, we all were apart of agreeing on the bottomline fees, ..., so I feel slightly irritated that a fee of $**** would be charged to us. My source of reference is that our previous surrogate ..., therefore, her attorney was not only apart of the bottomline, but also responsible for adding all of the legal wording for the state of ..., her entire fee was $****. My thinking is that $*** fair." (Email from my IM, my lawyer was referring to)
Yesterday I was greeted with a text from the lawyer that helped our family with the contract. She was referencing an email that I had not yet read. "I'm going to let you handle that email, 'cause I won't be nice in my response. ..." (text) "A and I really apologize for overlooking any part of the contract. I have to be honest and say that I have not read over the contract as I should, but will make a concerted effort to do so this weekend. A ... we were responsible for Miscellaneous expenses* for July and Aug on top of the $*** at time of meds and the $*** at time of transfer. We would never try to back out of our obligations ... let us know if you have a concern. We will get ... squared away. The only other concern ... the cost of your attorney. If we owe the money we will pay it, ..., Attorney C and her staff completed the bulk of the contract including legal wording for Georgia, we all were apart of agreeing on the bottomline fees, ..., so I feel slightly irritated that a fee of $**** would be charged to us. My source of reference is that our previous surrogate ..., therefore, her attorney was not only apart of the bottomline, but also responsible for adding all of the legal wording for the state of ..., her entire fee was $****. My thinking is that $*** fair." (Email from my IM, my lawyer was referring to)
I am very uncomfortable with the situation S's email eludes to. I have spoken with my attorney and she has agreed to S's $***. My concern is that the invoice for my attorney was submitted July 18, 2012 over a month before the embryo transfer. I should have been notified that there were concerns long before I agreed to and followed through with the date of August 20, 2012 for a transfer. Here I am with the stress of money issues trying my best to take care A and S's baby. I am concerned with the statement made by S above, about reading the contract(a statement made before in July more than once). I feel as though A and S do not fully understand the contract that they signed. I am also concerned that there were details that were not talked about, especially after the monthly allowance* questions. My initial email questioning the parameters of the allowance was sent July 30, 2012 and was resolved August 21, 2012, and only after a fourth email was sent. I have been very upfront that I have a $*** deductible. Are A and S aware that they will need to pay my deductible, or is everyone expecting me to take care of that, if so please let me know now so I can put money away each month to cover that expense. A and S are also responsible to pay for a life insurance policy that they are partial beneficiaries of, or is that going to be a problem when I submit that expense?.
I can feel S's "irritation" above. I am concerned that these circumstances if continued will cloud our relationship with resentment over money and concessions. I currently feel trapped, and somewhat betrayed, in a bad situation that could turn into something much worse. I would have appreciated all of these concerns to have been addressed before we signed and/or transferred. I spent much time and consideration on the contract before signing it. I purposely agreed to everything in it knowing how restrictive it is on my life, but understanding it is for the comfort and reassurance of A and S and safety of their embryo/baby.
Frustrated. What now? Enough rambling and venting!
Dear Heavenly Father, Holy Spirit and Precious Jesus, my Savior,
Guard, Guide and Direct me, please.
Amen
Monday, August 20, 2012
Embryo Transfer Today!
Today was embryo transfer day. It was very medical and spiritual. The procedure involved a very FULL bladder, a paper sheet, a fancy reclining table, stirrups, spec.ulum, a catheter, a great embryologist, a great RE, two ultrasound techs, one ultrasound machine, a 5 day blast and two couples. The IM was praying while the transfer was going on and then we, (the IP's, David and me) all prayed together before we went our separate ways, me and David back to work and the IM's to their home.
The embryo was a hatching 5 day blast, it looked amazing. I am a little achy, but I have been since we added progesterone. Official BETA test is scheduled for August 30, 2012, 10dp5dt(10 days past 5 day transfer).
I am still concerned with a couple of things not being followed per the contract hopefully we will get them ironed out this week.
Dear Heavenly Father,
There are no words to say. Please hear my heart.
Amen
The embryo was a hatching 5 day blast, it looked amazing. I am a little achy, but I have been since we added progesterone. Official BETA test is scheduled for August 30, 2012, 10dp5dt(10 days past 5 day transfer).
I am still concerned with a couple of things not being followed per the contract hopefully we will get them ironed out this week.
Dear Heavenly Father,
There are no words to say. Please hear my heart.
Amen
Wednesday, August 15, 2012
First Progesterone In Oil shot
Surrogacy takes a lot of medicines. I have been taking daily shots of Lupron(in my what I like to call stomach muscle protectant). Tomorrow marks the last of 34 Lupron shots. Last night was the first of an undetermined amount of Progesterone In Oil shots. My husband David has given me all but three(maybe) for the past two journeys and last night was the first of many for this journey. He is a PRO. I didn't feel a thing. I have a video on my YouTube channel if you would like to see.
The first shot of PIO means that the transfer is very close. I feel like this has taken a long time to get to this point, March 2012 to now. There are still some $$$ issues I am waiting on answers for. But, that being said, I have come too far and this couple has waited too long to get to this point and quit over a possible misunderstanding.
Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the blessings of service. Thank you for my best friend who is there for me and willing to go against his every, "I will not hurt my wife", to give me my shots. Thank you for LOVING me (ALL CAPS) not anything small, but everything BIG and all consuming LOVE.
Amen
Wednesday, August 8, 2012
How do I ask? What do I say?
Money is a very difficult topic to talk about. How do you bring up the subject that someone
owes you money??? How do you bring it up
within a situation that isn’t supposed to be about the money?
I do not want this relationship to be about me asking
for money. I want it to be about the IP’s
becoming P’s. If I have to ask for money
that makes it about money.
I am a surrogate.
I am being reimbursed for my expenses and time. We have a contract that has laid out the parameters
of who, how, when, why, and how much.
There are expenses involved. I
have been driving to Dr. appointments since March. I have been missing work, paying for the gas,
paying for the parking, paying the co-pays, working my full-time job that
provides the health insurance and taking prenatal vitamins to be certain my
folic is at a “healthy for the baby” level.
Our contract was delivered to me on Friday July 13, 2012 (VIA UPS) we
signed and got it notarized the same day and sent it back on Monday (VIA UPS). The contract states that upon the signing of the
contract I am to get a monthly allowance to help me pay for the above mentioned. I am also to get reimbursed for “procedures”. I have not gotten my allowance or reimbursement
for the procedure. I am okay with not getting
the reimbursement for the procedure, but I could really use the allowance. I have had to purchase more prenatal
vitamins, more alcohol swabs for the injections and miss a couple of hours of
work, pay for gas and parking and I will need to miss a couple more hours of
work, pay for parking and gas, on Friday.
Because I did not get an allowance at the signing I have
brought this question to the IP’s lawyers and my lawyer Monday July 30, 2012,
but have heard nothing back. I brought
it up again Friday August 3, 2012. My
lawyer told me she would contact the IP’s lawyer Monday August 6, 2012, I have
not heard anything. I have found out that the IP’s lawyer is currently out of
town until Monday August 13, 2012. Where
does that leave me?
I am really frustrated.
The lawyers have been paid. I am
spending money. I am doing my part and
NO ONE needs to ask or tell me to do what I am responsible to do. Why do I need to ask others to be responsible
to do what they are responsible for? I
have been taking my meds on time every day since July 14, 2012, changing doses
as directed, giving myself a shot every morning. I have been to 7 Dr./tests appointments since
March. I understand that most were
pre-contract, but the IP’s must understand that most of these were
pre-contract. This means that I have
gone above and beyond. I did most of
this, spent all my time and money getting ready for the contract without an
allowance or reimbursement for 4 months.
That was 4 months not paying an allowance or reimbursement for my
expenses.
What do I do?
Dear Heavenly Father,
You are in control.
Amen
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