The "Dating" part of surrogacy.

Have you ever heard the phrase "Don't date someone you are not willing (or planning) to marry?"  Dating in look for a mate was scary.  I did not do a lot of it.  I don't have many "friends" (my husband says I am too honest). So this is probably the most "getting to know you" before we sign on the line I have ever done.
When looking for a "Match" in the surrogacy world everyone involved must think about the relationship, the emotional, physical, and financial part of your life and how that is going to change.  As a surrogate you will be seen naked physically and emotionally for 9 + months by more than just the man who is your husband. 

• There are many Dr.'s, ultrasound tech's and nurses, and if your IP's are local and "Hands On", that will see you unrobed.  
• There are counselling appointments, psyche evaluations, and raw emotions(meds, pregnancy, delivery)
• There will be days when you can't hold it together and IP's that have never experienced pregnancy will not know how a pregnant woman feels and how to "handle/treat" (for lack of better words) her in this situation
• There will be days at Dr's appointments that you will want to talk about personal embarrassing physical stuff that you may not want to discuss with someone other than your Dr.
• In some instances your home will be inspected and a judgement will be made on whether you are a "good" homemaker
• There are days you will feel under appreciated and forgotten

So here I am in the dating phase. 
A potential IM and I have been emailing for a couple of weeks so far.  January 14th we are going to meet for lunch.  I am so excited.  She and her husband have been trying, they have frozen embryos and have been working with RBA.  (that is all I am going to share about them) I have enjoyed learning about them.  The places the have lived, and what they have learned and will be able to share with their child.  They seem to have a love for life, a real life, they live it and don't sit at home and watch other people living.  I have asked many questions and love reading the answers.  I hope they have some questions for us.  The last email sounded very positive in moving forward. 
I am praying. 

A pregnancy that did not happen

Hi All,
I know it has been a long time since I wrote.  Our contract restricted my blogging.  The parents have cancelled our contract so I am back to being able to write.
As you can see from the title the pregnancy did not happen.  Our transfer was November 2, 2011 the BETA was November 16, 2011. I am so sad for the IP's.  This was the last embryo.  I did not feel comfortable with NEFI.  I felt that the clinic believed in themselves too much.  In my initial interview with Dr Lavy he stated that he was going to follow the med protocol from my first journey because it was proven.  They did not.  They let my lining get up to 18, most surrogates I follow are happy to get to 8.  Was my lining too thick?  Dr Kort had the embryologist check the catheter to be certain the baby was not still there.  This clinic did not.  They woman in charge of "third party reproduction" scheduled my transfer date when the dr wasn't going to be in town originally.  Every ultrasound I had at NEFI was PAINFUL.  RBA in Atlanta never caused me pain.  I just never felt secure with NEFI.
SO Sad...  I have had very little contact with the IP's since the results.  I do not know what to say.  "I'm Sorry" doesn't seem to be enough. 
I have been contacted by a local couple about meeting and seeing if I can help them.  I am excited.  I will write more as the "dating" continues.

First, I am so thankful how GOD blessed me through the first journey.  Second, No Christmas card again this year.  I know we are not "friends" any more now that the baby is wholly theirs, but I thought maybe I would be on the Christmas card list. Talk about altruistic, I didn't even get the friendship that I thought developed during the journey. I am ok. I just thought...

We have a contract, we have a date

GOD is good!

Feels like a long time coming...

I can no longer blog about the surrogacy the contract won't allow it ....  This will now be a blog about my journey... as my many other roles

The transfer will be either November 3rd or 4th.

Please pray for these parents, this journey and the baby in waiting.

Thank you Father for your love and faithfulness. Amen

Well I started birth control pills yesterday

Well, yesterday I started the first meds of many...  It seems odd to be on birth control, I had my tubes "tied" in 1996.  The medication protocol is different with this clinic.  I do not know exactly how different, but this clinic does not use Lupron.  They don't use PIO shots they normally use progesterone suppositories.  I used and prefer PIO shots.  Using shots I know I am getting the exact dose, I can go swimming and have a lot less mess.  I love the idea that there is no guessing how much my body is absorbing with the shots. 
I do not know the date when I will start any of the other meds.  I just know it will be after the contract is signed. The contract won't be given to us for review until I pass the "tests".
Next week we fly up to Connecticut for the medical and psyche screening.  I keep joking with my husband that I hope they don't tell him I really am crazy. 
The Intended Parents, A & B from now on, are currently reviewing the contract.  It will take a week for the blood test results to come back so David and I will probably not see a contract until after Labor day. 
I would like a late September early October transfer date, but I need to be on Meds for three weeks before the transfer and I can't guess when the contract will be done and signed.  I keep trying to figure out the timing and I just need to give it to God.  He knows what I have planned, He knows what I need.  I have a business trip in September.  We have a family trip planned and paid for in October, we must cancel by September 12, 2011 to get all of our money back.  David's mother has asked us to host Thanksgiving this year.  I need to go see my parents for Christmas.    I have another BIG business trip in February.  Maxwell graduates high school in May, and starts college in August.  WOW!
Dear Heavenly Father,
I am amazed by your LOVE.  The blessing and favor that you rain down on me daily makes me breathless sometimes. I am found speechless when I try to explain it all to those who do not know you, because there are not enough words to express Who and What  you are to me.  You are my EVERYTHING.  Thank you so much for the love, grace, mercy, guidance, laughter, joy, challenges,... Thank you for loving me.  Thank you for forgiving me.  Holy Spirit please guide my ways that they may shine and point to God.  Jesus thank you for the sacrifice, for finishing.  You could have walked away at anytime but you stayed for me.  Thank you!
In Jesus most precious and holy name,
amen